from Jim Rohn:

If  you want to be a leader who attracts quality people, the key is to become a  person of quality yourself. Leadership is the ability to attract someone to the  gifts, skills, and opportunities you offer as an owner, as a manager, as a  parent. What’s important in leadership is refining your skills. All great leaders  keep working on themselves until they become effective.

Here are some specifics:

Learn to be strong but not impolite. It is an extra step you must take to become a  powerful, capable leader with a wide range of reach. Some people mistake rudeness for strength. It’s not even a good substitute.

Next, learn to be kind but not weak. We must not mistake weakness for kindness.  Kindness isn’t weak. Kindness is a certain type of strength. We must be kind  enough to tell someone the truth. We must be kind enough and considerate enough  to lay it on the line. We must be kind enough to tell it like it is and not  deal in delusion.

Next,  learn to be bold but not a bully. It takes boldness to win the day. To build  your influence, you’ve got to walk in front of your group. You’ve got to be  willing to take the first arrow, tackle the first problem, discover the first  sign of trouble. Like the farmer, if you want any rewards at harvest time, you  have got to be bold and face the weeds and the rain and the bugs straight on.  You’ve got to seize the moment.

Here’s  the next step. You’ve got to learn to be humble but not timid. You can’t get to  the high life by being timid. Some people mistake timidity for humility. But  humility is a virtue; timidity is a disease. It’s an affliction. It can be  cured, but it is a problem.

Humility  is almost a God-like word. A sense of awe. A sense of wonder. An awareness of  the human soul and spirit. An understanding that there is something unique  about the human drama versus the rest of life. Humility is a grasp of the  distance between us and the stars, yet having the feeling that we’re part of  the stars.

Here’s  a good tip: Learn to be proud but not arrogant. It takes pride to build your  ambitions. It takes pride in your community. It takes pride in a cause, in  accomplishment. But the key to becoming a good leader is to be proud without  being arrogant.

Do  you know the worst kind of arrogance? Arrogance from ignorance. It’s  intolerable. If someone is smart and arrogant, we can tolerate that. But if  someone is ignorant and arrogant, that’s just too much to take.

The  next step is learning to develop humor without folly. In leadership, we learn  that it’s okay to be witty but not silly; fun but not foolish.

Next,  deal in realities. Deal in truth. Save yourself the agony of delusion. Just  accept life as it is. Life is unique. The whole drama of life is unique. It’s  fascinating.

Life  is unique. Leadership is unique. The skills that work well for one leader may  not work at all for another. However, the fundamental skills of leadership can  be adopted to work well for just about everyone: at work, in the community, and  at home.

Sharing some notes that I have taken recently from some of my favorite leadership sources. Some of them, I hope you can use for yourself and your staff, others for your athletes, and most of them for both groups!

As with all of my posts, I am sure that you won’t agree with everything that is listed here and will probably find some that you either can use as is or that you can modify to meet your needs.

Kevin Eastman

Twitter: @KevinEastman

The mind & the attitude can have a major impact on how far one can go. The mind has to be “clutter free” and the attitude has to be “all in”!

Understand that trust has eyes & ears. It evaluates the consistency & authenticity of what it sees & hears. It takes its time to evaluate you!

Make sure the “give-get” percentages favor the “give”. Giving should be part of our make up. We all truly do have things to give & share!

As much as we like to tell people what we think it’s even more important to put thought to what we say. Hard to take words back!

Just as you work out physically, you must also get your repetitions in mentally. Challenge yourself with heavier mental reps as well. Stretch yourself!

Every so often a great exercise is to get away & just think about or remind yourself what you TRULY BELIEVE in; things that are non negotiable!!

Give yourself a chance to succeed. Success is about investment; adjustment; & commitment. Determine which, if any, you need to improve on!

To be a true teammate: must hold yourself accountable to everything you hold others accountable to. The one thing a true team is not: self centered!

Everyone says communication is so important-then why are we not as good at listening? It’s critical to success. We ALL need work on this SKILL!

To be a great teammate your pride will take a hit at times and your pride can never take precedent over the success of the team!

Being a good teammate is still doing your part when things are going bad for you. Being a good team is helping that Individual get out of it!

Consistency is a direct result of doing the right things the right way–now. Focus on the execution of now & discipline to do this every day!

A team will always have challenges and issues. That is where the strength of a team must show up: using everyone in anyway to get through them!

John Carrier

These notes were reposted with permission by John Carrier from his coaching blog. Here is a link to the blog: www.johncarrier.blogspot.com

I am currently reading Phil Jackson’s book, Eleven Rings. One gem I’ve pulled out in the first 100 pages is the “Bullseye Test” he uses with his players.

The Bulls eye Test is simple, yet insightful. Give each player a three ring bulls eye. Have them write where they feel that they are in terms of their connection to the rest of their teammates. Don’t give them any more than that. You can read a little more from the inside of the book at Amazon by clicking the cover of the book at the left, or you can click on this link: Eleven Rings: The Soul of Success

You then look at their bulls eyes and see how connected each person feels to our group. It also gives you a handle on how connected the team feels as a group. If they are very connected they are in the middle, if they feel kind of connected their name will be in the second ring, and if they don’t feel connected they write their name on the last ring or outside the rings. A lot of times it comes down to playing time – the more they play the closer to the middle they write their name. So you have to account for that a little bit when looking at them.

Once you’ve done the exercise, you can use them to have individual talks with your players. Ask lots of questions about why they feel that way, and if they are outside the middle how can we move them closer (without adjusting playing time of course). It will also help you determine if how to proceed with team bonding activities during the season. It’s something we will definitely use this season.

The following are some other notes he osted

John Tauer – St. Thomas University – Motivation

People are mostly motivated by three things:

1. Autonomy
   Choice in life.
   Give athletes choices in what drills you do inpractice (within reason).
   Even one or two choices per practice can be powerful. 
2. Togetherness
   Individuals need to belong to something bigger than themselves and have a more powerful purpose.
   Keep your finger on the pulse
   Team building
3. Competence
   Being good at things.
   How can you put your athletes in positions to find success?

TJ Rosene – Emmanuel College/PGC – Building a Culture

Greatest Teammate Exercise
-Have players close their eyes and imagine the greatest teammate they ever had.
-Call on players to share the characteristics of that teammate.
-Make a team list of the traits of great teammates.
-Turn it around on them – why can’t EVERYONE on this team be a great teammate?
-Make the list into a “commitment list” that everyone is going to commit to (coaches included) and everyone will be held accountable to for the year.

Rocking Chair Statement
-As a coach, write a statement about what you want athletes to remember about you when you are old in a rocking chair on your front porch!

The Best At What They Know
-Everyone is the best at what they know.
-If you’ve got a problem athlete, they are likely exhibiting that behavior because that’s what they know.

Communication Must Haves
-Truth, Love, Transparency
-N.I.T.E
+Name, Information, Tone, Eye Contact
+Simple but effective

Open Mic Monday
-Do this as a team
-Players can stand up and say ANYTHING that is on their mind, especially things they are frustrated with.
-They can also ASK ANYTHING of teammates and coaches and will receive an honest answer.
-You must speak it in love and not anger.
*This is a GREAT WAY to make sure that issues stay in house and don’t ever boil over.

Lion vs. Sparrow
-Lion is content and confident. He doesn’t worry about anything he can’t control.
-The sparrow is always frantic.
-Lions play through bad calls, band bounces, etc without emotion.
-Sparrows constantly wine and complain
*Might change it to wolf and squirrel to fit Minnesota.

The Starfish Story

I received this story several years ago in a frame at the end of our season from some of the graduating seniors. I definitely feel that it is worth sharing. If you have seen this before, it is definitely worth reflecting on again.

A young boy walked along a stretch of beach skimming shells into the waves, The boy noticed the distant figure of an old man.  Curious to see what, the man was doing, he dropped his shells and ran through the sand.

As he approached, the boy noticed the man repeatedly stooping to pick up objects and throw them beyond the breaking surf.  The boy also noticed that the sand was strewn with thousands of starfish, washed ashore by the out going tide.

The boy watched the man repeat his actions to returning starfish to the cool waters before the became lifeless, baked by the noonday sun.

The boy spoke.  “I see you throwing starfish into the ocean old man.  Why are you doing that?”

“To make  a difference,” replied the man.

‘Surely,” said the boy, with thousands of starfish all over the beach what possible difference could you make?”

The man smiled knowingly as he reached for yet another starfish.  As he tossed it far from the shore, he said,”It makes a difference to this one, son – it makes a difference to this one.’

The boy left the old man and thought about his words.  As he walked along the -beach, once again alone, he began picking up objects – tossing them into the sea. However, instead of sea shells this time, they were starfish.  The boy was returning them to their home.

He learned a powerful lesson that day.  He discovered that he too could make a difference.

Scott Rosberg – 2015

My son, Morgan, calls me, “Dad.” It is my favorite name that I am called. I love hearing him call me “Dad.” I also realize that it is the most important name that I am called. While to just about everyone else in the world my name is “Scott,” I am “Dad” to Morgan, and I take the responsibility that comes with that name very seriously.

Other than “Scott,” “Dad,” and probably a few choice names people have called me through the years, the other name that I am most often called is “Coach.”  Many years ago John Wooden wrote a great book called They Call Me Coach. The book is filled with many lessons that he learned throughout his life that made their way into his teaching and coaching of young people. The title, They Call Me Coach, is a good title, for it makes the reader zero in on the concept of who he is and how the title that people called him shaped his life. While this post is titled “My Name is Coach,” I am not claiming to be able to make John Wooden’s title or his ideas better or even add to them. Rather, this is my response to a thought that hit me numerous times over my career, and it has hit me hard recently. A few months ago, I was told by our school’s athletic director that I would not be re-hired as the varsity boys’ basketball coach. This post is about one of the thoughts I had as I realized that, for the time being, I am an “ex-coach”

As this new reality hit me, I realized that there is no such thing as an “ex-coach.” Once you are a coach, you are always a coach. This has been made clear to me at other points in my life when I stepped away from coaching for short periods of time. I started coaching at age 20, and for over thirty years, there have only been a few years where I have not coached in some fashion. Each time I stepped away from coaching for a while, I never felt like I was out of coaching. I was constantly watching sports with a coach’s eye, reading books by coaches, watching videos, and even attending coaching clinics. So the fact that I wasn’t coaching at those particular times didn’t make me feel that I wasn’t a coach.

But there is something even more powerful that hammers home the concept of “once a coach, always a coach.” People call me “Coach” whenever they greet me. Other coaches, teachers, administrators, parents, community members, and of course players who I have coached through the years all address me as “Coach.” When I talk to former players, the greeting is always, “Hey, Coach.” This happens often with players who have graduated. To them, I am not “Scott,” I am “Coach.” I have only had a few ex-players in my life ever address me by my first name, even those who are in their 30’s and 40’s now. I would have no problem with them calling me “Scott” – it is my name that everybody else calls me. However, just about every one of my players still calls me “Coach.” There are a few reasons why this happens. One is that they are uncomfortable calling me anything but “Coach” due to the respect that they have for me. Another is that they also have a level of respect for the title of “Coach.” Finally, one of the main reasons players still call me “Coach,” is that is my name to them. That is all they have known me as, and that is all they would ever consider calling me.

I still remember the first time I was ever called “Coach.” I imagine the young man who called me “Coach” for the first time doesn’t even remember me, but I have never forgotten the moment it happened, and I even remember the young man’s name – Matt Schuning – because of how powerful the moment was for me. I was student-teaching, and I was helping coach the freshmen boys’ basketball team. Matt was on the freshman team, and he was in my freshman English class. It was the day after our first practice, and Matt walked into the room and said, “Hey, Coach.” I was stunned. Here was a kid calling me, “Coach,” after one day of me being his coach. I thought, “That’s cool! I’m a Coach!” And then it hit me – “Whoa! I’m a Coach. These kids are looking up to me. They are taking their cues from me. They are listening to what I have to say and watching how I act. Holy Cow! I better do things the right way. I better behave properly. I better be a good role model. I better not screw this up!” I was 20-years-old, and the concept of “responsibility” had just hit me in the face with one 15-year-old boy calling me “Coach.”

That was 1981. For 34 years, I have never taken the title, the responsibility, or the importance of what I do for kids as a teacher and coach lightly. I have never taken the name that I am known by to so many people – “Coach” – for granted. Whether or not I ever coach again, I know that my name is “Coach” to thousands of people out there, and I have a huge responsibility to live up to being called “Coach.” Other than “Dad,” there is no greater name that I will be called. I have always loved and will always love being called “Coach,” and I will always keep in mind the great responsibility that I owe to that name. I hope any of you who are called “Coach” love being called “Coach” as much as I do. I also hope that you, too, will treat the name “Coach” with the dignity and responsibility that it deserves.

Do you remember the first time you were called “Coach”? Do you remember how that made you feel? I would love to hear from you in the comments section here or below this post on my website – www.coachwithcharacter.com.

About the Author of this Article

Scott Rosberg has been a coach (basketball, soccer, & football) at the high school level for 30 years, an English teacher for 18 years, and an athletic director for 12 years. He has published seven booklets on coaching and youth/school athletics, two books of inspirational messages and quotes for graduates, and a newsletter for athletic directors and coaches. He also speaks to schools, teams, and businesses on a variety of team-building, leadership, and coaching topics. Scott has a blog and a variety of other materials about coaching and athletic topics on his website – www.coachwithcharacter.com. He can be reached by email at [email protected].

Scott is also a member of the Proactive Coaching speaking team. Proactive Coaching is dedicated to helping organizations create character and education-based team cultures, while providing a blueprint for team leadership. They help develop confident, tough-minded, fearless competitors and train coaches and leaders for excellence and significance. Proactive Coaching can be found on the web at www.proactivecoaching.info. Also, you can join the 200,000+ people who have “Liked” Proactive Coaching’s Facebook page at www.facebook.com/proactivecoach. Scott can also be reached through Proactive Coaching at [email protected].

Thankful for Teachers, Coaches, and Leaders in Our Lives

by Scott Rosberg

Editor’s note from Brian: This is being posted at Thanksgiving, but I believe the message is significant year round

The posts I am writing this month when we celebrate Thanksgiving revolve around the concept of things we have to be thankful for. Last week I wrote a more personal post about things and people for which I am thankful. Today I want to ask you to consider a group of people in your life who I believe you should be thankful for. I want you to consider the teachers, coaches, and leaders who you have studied or followed and the mentors who have guided you. Are you thankful for the contributions that they made in your life?  Have you told them?

We tell our students, athletes, and their parents how teachers and coaches play such an important role in kids’ lives. They provide knowledge, guidance, counseling, and nurturing for so many young people every day. They are selfless. Their whole professional life is about serving others. Teachers and coaches are there for you when you need them. So we tell our kids to thank their teachers and coaches for all that they do.

Today I want you to consider, as a coach/leader yourself, who has done the same kinds of things for you in your professional life. Who has taught you strategies, tactics, and the fine points of how to coach/lead? Who has helped guide you at times when you were struggling? Who has helped you with your coaching/leadership style? Who has been an ear for you when you needed to bounce ideas off someone, had questions about a certain situation, or had a tough problem that you were dealing with? Who sparked something in you that you didn’t even know you had in you? Who has helped you become the best you are capable of becoming?

For most of you, there are many people who have had that kind of impact on you. Of course, there will be some people’s faces that will quickly jump into your mind. These are the people who have had the greatest impact on your career, the job you do, and how you do what you do. These are the “life-changers” that so many of us point to as being the most influential people in our lives. Certainly, our parents will fall into this category. But who are the other people in your life who have had the greatest impact on you becoming the coach/leader you are today?

As you contemplate who has had a huge impact on you, you will probably realize that there are others who have also contributed to who you have become as a coach/leader. These may be people who played a smaller role in your growth as a coach/leader, but who, nonetheless, have been influential in some way in you becoming the person you are today. They may have offered a tip, may have been an example of a certain way to deal with a situation, or may have been someone from back when you were younger who you realize has always been a part of how you live your life. While their role may not seem as large and influential as the people who immediately stand out as impactful to you, the accumulation of all of their contributions has ended up having a huge impact on who you have become.

I am going to issue two challenges to you to try to accomplish by the end of this upcoming holiday season. First, make sure you thank the people who have been so impactful in your life. Of course, this starts with those people who immediately came to mind when you were asked to think of the people who have had the greatest influence for you. But this challenge also includes reaching out to the other people who have had what may seem like minor influences on you, but when you add them all together, you realize their impact has been huge. Do not put this challenge off. The people who have had an impact on your life will be so grateful that you have recognized them and thanked them for all that they have done for you.

The second challenge could be even more important than the first. I want to challenge you to become one of the people that other people will point to as having great influence and impact on their lives. Become a catalyst for growth, development, and inspiration to help others become all that they are capable of becoming. Do all that you can to pay forward the concepts that so many others have done for you. Be the inspiration to become one’s best the same way someone else was an inspiration for you. And do this for a variety of people in a variety of circumstances. Be the coach who inspires kids to stretch themselves beyond what they thought they were capable of. Be the coach who works hard to create a positive experience for everyone in the program.  Be the leader who helps other coaches, teachers, and supervisors feel the confidence to try something new or handle some situation that they may have struggled with before. Be the friend who is there for someone who is facing a struggle that they are not sure how to get through.

True leadership is about serving. When you help others get what they want, overcome obstacles, and develop the ability to become all they are capable of becoming, you help yourself and your teams do the same. Gandhi put it so well – “Be the change you want to see in the world.” You have a great opportunity to change so many lives for the better because of your leadership role in people’s lives. Lead and inspire with honor, dignity, and compassion, and others will follow your example. By doing so, you will soon be the answer that someone gives when they are asked the question, “Who are you thankful for?” Go to the Coach with Character Facebook Page and let us know who you are thankful for in your professional life.

About the Author of this Article

Scott Rosberg has been a coach (basketball, soccer, & football) at the high school level for 30 years, an English teacher for 18 years, and an athletic director for 12 years. He has published seven booklets on coaching and youth/school athletics, two books of inspirational messages and quotes for graduates, and a newsletter for athletic directors and coaches. He also speaks to schools, teams, and businesses on a variety of team-building, leadership, and coaching topics. Scott has a blog and a variety of other materials about coaching and athletic topics on his website – www.coachwithcharacter.com. He can be reached by email at [email protected].

Scott is also a member of the Proactive Coaching speaking team. Proactive Coaching is dedicated to helping organizations create character and education-based team cultures, while providing a blueprint for team leadership. They help develop confident, tough-minded, fearless competitors and train coaches and leaders for excellence and significance. Proactive Coaching can be found on the web at www.proactivecoaching.info. Also, you can join the 200,000+ people who have “Liked” Proactive Coaching’s Facebook page at www.facebook.com/proactivecoach. Scott can also be reached through Proactive Coaching at [email protected].