This post was written by Alan Stein.

As Notorious B.I.G. once said, ‘Things done changed.’

Players today are different than they were when I was growing up… and I’m not even that old. I know every generation says that… but it’s true.

One of the biggest changes to our society as a whole has been technology… more specifically the Internet… and even more specifically… mobile smartphones and social media.

What does that have to do with athletics?

Everything.

Sports have always been and will always be an interpersonal activity that requires human connection and communication.

Coaching is all about building quality relationships. As they say, ‘it ain’t about the X’s and O’s… it’s about the Jimmy’s and Joe’s.’

But because of things like social media and the ‘everyone gets a trophy’ mentality, the Jimmy’s and Joe’s of 2015 are not the same as they were in 1995.

And even though we can’t stop the waves… we can all learn to surf.

Here are 22 tips for coaching today’s athletes…

1. Find out how to truly connect with your players. Find out what makes them tick, what motivates them and what is the best way to coach them (in front of their peers and behind closed doors).

2. Embrace social media and technology… it’s not going anywhere. It’s important to your players, so it needs to be important to you.

3. Learn to speak their language (I am not referring to profanity). The top 2 ways players communicate today is through text message and social media (particularly Instagram and Twitter). Learn to use those platforms.

4. Understand this: consistency breeds excellence – excellence breeds trust – trust breeds loyalty – loyalty builds a strong program. Be consistent with everything you do. Players won’t respect you if you don’t.

5. Encourage this 3-step mistake policy with your players – Admit it. Fix it. Don’t repeat it! The first time it is a mistake. The second time it is a decision.

6. Coach attitude and effort before X’s and O’s. Without proper attitude and effort the X’s and O’s don’t matter.

7. Clearly articulate your core values, principles and each player’s role. These are non-negotiable. They make up your program’s culture.

8. Players want to know the why behind everything. So tell them! Explain why you do what you do, why you believe what you believe, and why you expect ABC from them. The higher the perceived relevance, the higher the buy-in. And at the end of the day, a coach’s #1 job is to get buy-in from every member of the program.

9. Social media has created an abundance of superficial ‘friends’ – make sure your players know you truly care about them (on and off the court). That you have their back.

10. Don’t try to be ‘friends’ with your players. If you are too close to them personally you can’t hold them accountable. You should be a role model, a teacher and a mentor… but not a buddy.

11. Players all learn differently. Make sure you can effectively teach each type of learner (audio, visual, intrapersonal).

12. Players want to show their individuality (shoes, haircuts and especially with pre-game starting line-up announcement antics and routines). Don’t fight it. Have some leniency within your program rules. Respectfully, today’s idols and role models are a lot different.

13. Create a climate and culture that values people over productivity. Your players must know you care about them as a human being first and a player second.

14. If you want to know if you are a good coach…ask your worst player.

15. You’re either coaching it or you are allowing it to happen. You either accept it or correct it.

16. Replace ‘but’ with ‘now’ when instructing a player. For example, “I like your release, now try to get your elbow over your knee.” This minor change will make a huge impact.

17. Focus on what your players can be… not what they are.

18. Science shows that most people have a pretty firm definition of what is right and wrong by age 13. Hold them accountable. Ignorance is not an excuse. However, learn to choose your battles. Kids will be kids. If a players posts something stupid on social media… don’t condemn them for life. Use it to teach a life lesson. Hold them accountable, but use it to teach.

19. Players actually want to be held accountable.  It shows them that you care and are invested in their success.

20. Most of the players today have grown up in the ‘trophy generation’ – which has created an immense sense of entitlement. Players need to learn another ‘E’ word… earn. Create a system where players have to earn

21. Players today want to play immediately. They don’t understand the concept of ‘right of passage.’ Freshman want to play varsity. Young players want to play serious minutes. Learn to channel this desire but keep them focused on the process and the long term.

22. One of the biggest changes between the players of 1995 and 2015 is with the parents. Parents are much more involved and much more vocal (especially on social media). Parents can be a tremendous support system… or they can be a total thorn.
    I’m honored to be in the coaching fraternity.Alan SteinHardwood Hustle Blog
    http://www.About.me/AlanStein

This article was written by Jeff Janssen, founder and president of the Janssen Sports Leadership Center

Jeff directs cutting-edge Leadership Academies for high school and college coaches and all across the nation including North Carolina, Pittsburgh, Illinois, Yale, Baylor, Wake Forest, and Winston-Salem State.

His site has several other useful articles for coaches and team leaders. Here is the link: Coaches Championship Network

Student-athletes of all ages often wonder, “What can I do to be a better leader?”

Fortunately leadership opportunities abound and present themselves on a daily basis. While they may be subtle, leaders are usually given at least a dozen opportunities to demonstrate leadership every single day.

These leadership opportunities are rarely available in the form of dramatic, rousing, “win one for the Gipper” type speeches, but most often present themselves in simple, yet significant interactions on a daily basis.

There’s a quote we often use in our Leadership Academies by Helen Keller that drives home the value of these seemingly trivial, yet critical leadership moments. She said, “I long to accomplish great and noble tasks, but it is my chief duty to accomplish humble tasks as though they were great and noble. The world is moved along not only by the mighty shoves of its heroes, but also by the aggregate of the tiny pushes of each honest worker.”

Most emerging leaders erroneously view and define leadership as the mighty shoves reserved only for the heroic captains of the team. In actuality, however, it’s the tiny pushes of leadership that happen more frequently and have the greatest impact over time.

To help your emerging and existing leaders recognize, value, and act on the many tiny opportunities to lead every day, I have created a simple 12-point checklist. I encourage you to go over the checklist with your leaders to show them just how simple leadership can be – yet how profoundly powerful the aggregate of these 12 daily leadership actions can be on your program.

12 SIMPLE YET SIGNIFICANT DAILY TO DO’S FOR LEADERS

1. Be the hardest worker at practice today. Without fail, one of the quickest ways to impact a team is with your own work ethic. Choose to be one of the hardest workers on your team today. Not only does it set the tone for the work ethic of your program, it is also one of the best and quickest ways to enhance your leadership credibility with your teammates and coaches.

2. Be a spark of energy and enthusiasm today. Let your passion for the sport shine through today. Spread a contagious energy and enthusiasm amongst your teammates. Think about how lucky you are to be able to play and compete. Remember back to when you were a young child and reconnect with the joy you played with back then. Make your sport fun again for yourself and your teammates.

3. Model mental toughness today. Because your teammates will look to you under pressure, adversity, and stress, be sure to model mental toughness today. Bounce back quickly after errors to show your teammates how to respond to negative situations. Maintain your poise and optimism despite any mistakes you might make so that your teammates can trust and rely on you to get them through the tough times.

4. Connect with a teammate today. Leadership is all about relationships. Invest the time to build and strengthen the relationships you have with each of your teammates. Inquire about their day, challenges, and goals. Make a special and ongoing effort to get to know every athlete on your team, not just your friends and classmates. The relationship building you do each day will pay off immeasurably down the road.

5. Compliment a teammate today. Be on the lookout for teammates who are contributing to your team. Call out a teammate for making a hustle play, pushing through a weight workout, recovering quickly from a mistake, getting an A on an exam, etc. Praise the actions and attitudes you want to see repeated. As Mother Teresa once said, “Kind words are short and easy to speak but their echoes are truly endless.”

6. Challenge a teammate today. Challenge at least one of your teammates today. Positively push them and yourself to make the most of your workout. Make a friendly wager to see if they can be successful at least 4 out of 5 times in a drill. See if you both can improve your times in conditioning. Offer to stay after to help if there is anything they want to work on. Good leaders consistently invite, inspire, and sometimes implore others to greatness.

7. Support a teammate today. Odds are, at least one of your teammates is struggling with something today – it could be a performance slump, a rocky romantic relationship, a disagreement with a coach, an unglamorous role, struggling with a class, or a sick family member. Good leaders are consistently on the lookout for teammates who might be struggling and are ready to offer an ear to listen, an encouraging word, a pat on the back, or a shoulder to cry on.

8. Constructively confront negativity, pessimism, and laziness today. As a leader, have the courage to constructively confront the negativity, pessimism, and laziness that will crop up on your team from time to time. Instead of fueling the fire by joining in or silently standing by, be sure to refocus your teammates on solutions rather than dwelling on and complaining about the problems. Left unchecked, these problems can quickly grow to distract, divide, and destroy your team.

9. Build and bond your team today. Team chemistry naturally ebbs and flows throughout the course of the season. Take the time to monitor and maintain your team’s chemistry. Let your reserves and support staff know how much you appreciate them. Stay connected and current with each of the natural sub-groups on your team. Douse any brush fires that might be occurring and continually remind team members about your common goal and common bond.

10. Check in with your coach today. Invest the time to check in with your coach today. Ask what you can do to best help the team this week. Find out what your coach wants to accomplish with today’s practice. Also discuss if there is anything your coach is concerned about regarding your team. Discuss your collective insights on your team’s chemistry, focus, and mindset. Work together to effectively co-lead your team.

11. Remind your team how today’s work leads to tomorrow’s dreams. It’s easy to get bogged down during your season with monotonous drills, tiring conditioning, and demanding workouts. Remind your teammates how all the quality work you do today gives you a distinct advantage over your opponents. Help them see and even get excited about how today’s hard work is a long-term investment in your team’s goals, rather than just a short-term hardship or sacrifice.

12. Represent yourself and team with class and pride today. Leaders have the awesome privilege and responsibility of representing their teams. Take advantage of this opportunity by representing your team with class and pride today. Hold a door open for someone, sit in the front rows of class and actively engage in the discussion, say please and thank you, dress in respectful attire, etc. These tiny pushes represent you and your team with class and distinction. And they ultimately set you up for a lifetime of respect and success.

Great leaders willingly invest the time and effort to engage in these 12 leadership actions on a daily basis. In applying these principles, leaders build strong relationships, keep their team on track, and enhance their credibility.

Encourage your emerging leaders to take advantage of at least 7-9 of these actions on daily basis. Your veteran leaders should be looking to capitalize on 10 to all 12 of these opportunities.

And as a coach, I encourage you to go back and look at all 12 again as well. The 12 leadership behaviors are things that you could and should be doing on a daily basis too. Be sure that you too take advantage of these 12 tiny pushes of leadership that will ultimately make a huge impact on your team.

This article was written by Jeff Janssen, founder and president of the Janssen Sports Leadership Center

Jeff directs cutting-edge Leadership Academies for high school and college coaches and all across the nation including North Carolina, Pittsburgh, Illinois, Yale, Baylor, Wake Forest, and Winston-Salem State.

His site has several other useful articles for coaches and team leaders. Here is the link: Coaches Championship Network

These leadership commandments were written by Kent M. Keith.

Some really good thoughts to apply to our own leadership styles and attitudes as well as to share with our coaching staffs and players.

1. People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered. Love them anyway.
2. If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives. Do good anyway.
3. If you are successful, you win false friends and true enemies. Succeed anyway.
4. The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway.
5. Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable. Be honest and frank anyway.
6. The biggest men with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest men with the smallest minds. Think big anyway.
7. People favor underdogs, but follow only top dogs. Fight for a few underdogs anyway.
8. What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight. Build anyway.
9. People really need help but may attack you if you do help them. Help people anyway.
10. Give the world the best you have and you’ll get kicked in the teeth. Give the world the best you have anyway.

I am not sure where I found this, and don’t agree with all of it, but I think that there are some good thoughts that coaches can use for themselves, their staffs, and their teams.

A leader…

1. has to have ABSOLUTE INTEGRITY, or it does not matter what else he or she has.

2. has to be WILLING AND ABLE TO DO WORK, or it does not matter what else he or she has.

3. has to be OBJECTIVE. If an executive could be described in one word, this would be it.

4. has to have LEADERSHIP, which is hard to define, but may be described as that quality in a person which makes others want to do what the leader wants them to do.

5. has COURAGE . I don’t want to get courage and bravery mixed up. If a neighbor has a mean dog and you are not afraid to go in his yard, this is bravery. If you are afraid but go in the yard anyway, this is courage. Courage is what makes someon buy natural resources for the company’s use in poor times when acreage,or leases are cheap.

6. has IMAGINATION. Most of the good things civilization has achieved are the result of somebody’s seeing, in his mind’s eye, how to do something better, or make something better. Without imagination an executive cannot foresee the good things the future may hold. Without imagination he is not able to put himself in another man’s place, which he must do.

7. MUST DELEGATE AUTHORITY AND RESPONSIBILITY if he does not do this, there is not enough time to accomplish a great deal.

8. MUST CHECK, AFTER THIS DELEGATION, TO SEE THAT RESULTS ARE OBTAINED. The leader must have progress reports not only for his own information but also to gauge personnel in preparation for his next delegation of authority.

9. MUST EVALUATE HIS TIME. A busy person does not have time to explain carefully a directive to a subordinate, and in most cases tell him the reason why he wants it done. Otherwise, it is likely to get all snarled up and have to be handled twice which a busy person does not have time to do.

10. DOES THE IMPORTANT IN MOST CASES, INSTEAD OF THE URGENT. It is so easy to decide and handle the easy ones. So often the temptation is to put aside a difficult decision until the easy ones are finished, in the hope that some additional easy ones come up to further postpone the important.

11. MUST PLAY NO FAVORITES. Anyone can do what they want with their own money. With the company’s money, there is no right to play favorites. The person who should be promoted is the person who is doing the job at the time better than others are doing theirs. If the word gets around that the executive plays no favorites, the personnel will naturally take pride in doing their jobs well, no matter how rarely they come in contact with the boss.

12. RECOGNIZES HIS/HER OWN WEAKNESSES AND SEEKS OR EMPLOYS ASSISTANCE IN THESE RESPECTS. The Great Creator has rarely produced a man without weaknesses. What often make a strong corporation is people of different but special talents accomplishing together and with the assistance of each other, more than any individual could accomplish alone.

13. TRIES TO HELP OTHERS OVERCOME THEIR WEAKNESSES AND COMPLIMENTS THEM ON THEIR GOOD TRAITS. The success of an organization is based to a large extent on loyalty and cooperation. A man might be the best coxswain in the world, but without the cooperation of the other men in his crew, the race could not be won.

14. IF SOMETHING TURNS OUT ESPECIALLY GOOD, THE LEADER FINDS SOMEONE IN THE ORGANIZATION TO SHARE THE CREDIT, IF SOMETHING GOES ESPECIALLY BAD, THE LEADER FINDS SOME WAY TO SHARE THE BLAME, You tell me who takes the responsibility for the errors and I will tell you who IS the boss,

15. MUST BE A GOOD LISTENER, I have a prayer “Oh Lord, let me know that I do not have to speak on every subject that is broached.”

16. MUST NOT TAKE HIMSELF or HERSELF TOO SERIOUSLY. I have never heard a leader criticized for taking their business too seriously. If the leader can do this, and not take himself or herself too seriously, she and her associates have a happier life.

17. MUST NOT ALLOW HERSELF TO BECOME DISCOURAGED. Even the inevitable can change from day to day, and persistence often accomplishes the seemingly impossible.

18. DOES WHAT HE SAYS HE IS GOING TO DO, EVEN IN A CASUAL STATEMENT. I know people who, if they told me casually, “I will write you a letter about that tomorrow,” and I didn’t receive the letter, I would send flowers. I would know they were dead.

19. MUST NOT MAKE AN UNQUALIFIED STATEMENT UNLESS SHE IS SUFFICIENTLY INFORMED ON FACTS. A statement may often be the basis of important action. If based on incomplete information, results may be disastrous.

20. MUST LET HIS STAFF KNOW THAT HE MEANS WHAT HE SAYS WHEN HE TELLS THEM THAT HE WANTS THEM TO DISAGREE WITH HIM WHEN THEY DO. Nearly every executive tells his staff he wants them to speak out when they disagree. He must convince them that he means what he says when he makes this statement for it is their duty to give him the benefit of their best judgment and experience. At the same time, disagreement does not absolve a man from giving his best efforts once a course of action is decided upon.

21. LIMITS HER NUMBER OF REASONS. One reason for a decision is better than several. If several reasons are given, and one of these, though not controlling, is disproved it can make awkward or tear down her whole presentation.

22. MUST NOT GET MAD UNLESS HE DECIDES TO. There are times, like a boxer working himself up to a fighting pitch, when an executive has to show a flash of fire to carry or arouse people out of their apathy. But this must be a deliberate, and not impulsive, action.

23. RECOGNIZES THE UNUSUAL FROM THE ROUTINE, AND HANDLES THE UNUSUAL IN A SPECIAL MANNER. Many leaders adequately handle the routine every day, and the business gets along all right. Sometimes even a casual request, due to its source, merits uusual handling.

24. MUST NOT BE OVERLY SUBJECT TO FLATTERY. Star dust blinds more people than sand.

25. MUST STEEP HERSELF IN THE FACTS, BUT MUST RECOGNIZE THAT A TIME COMES WHEN SHE MUST DEFER RESEARCH AND MAKE THE DECISION, So often voluminous research is acquired. For what purpose? To acquire additional voluminous research. The difficult, the decision, is postponed.

26. MUST LIKE PEOPLE. A man who does not like people multiplies his work and minimizes his effectiveness.

27. SHOULD HAVE A SENSE OF HUMOR. Without this I doubt if a leader can endure, with good grace, the rugged path that accompanies accomplishment.