These articles were written and contributed by Scott Rosberg

Process and Habits for Achieving Goals (Post 4 of 5)

This is the fourth post in a series of posts I have been doing on “Individual vs. Team.” If you missed those first three posts, go to the “Blog” page of the Coach with Character website – www.coachwithcharacter.com – and scroll down to the posts – “Individual vs. Team,” “Individual Goals vs. Team goals,” and “Aligning Individual and Team Goals.” Today, we will move into the importance of process and habits when it comes to developing goals.

Quite honestly, while setting goals is an important step in getting where you want to go, the setting of the goals is worthless if you don’t commit to the daily, weekly, and monthly habits necessary to get to your goals. In fact, authors Joshua Medcalf and Jamie Gilbert go so far as to say to “burn your goals” (in their book Burn Your Goals) and zero in on the mental toughness necessary to stay focused on the habits you need to achieve what you seek. Check out Burn Your Goals for more on this concept.

Focus on the Process, not the Outcome

This concept discusses something that is critical to any success that someone seeks, either individually or in a group. That something is “process.” Process has become a bit of a buzz-word over the last few years. However, there is a good reason why buzzwords have made their way into our lexicon at any given time, and the word “process” is no exception.

Process is important because it strips everything down to the necessities. It helps people focus their attention where it needs to be focused – on doing what needs to be done to achieve what one is seeking to achieve. By focusing on process, people can put blinders on and ignore all the noise that can create chaos and confusion while trying to achieve an outcome or a goal.

Focusing on process requires discipline. According to Bruce Brown of Proactive Coaching, “Discipline is focused attention and focused effort.” I love that simple, straightforward definition of discipline. When you focus your attention on doing what needs to be done, doing it the right way, and doing it that way every time it is needed, you have discipline. When you have discipline, you take care of your process. When you take care of your process, you work towards achieving your goals.

Let me give you an example of this concept that might help to illustrate this point. It will use a skill in basketball, but it can be used for any skill in any sport. Pick your sport and pick a skill and use that skill as you compare it to the analogy you will see here.

My son is a high school basketball player. When he gets fouled and goes to the free throw line, there are all kinds of things that could be running through his mind as he prepares to shoot the free throws. Imagine if it is late in a close game, late in the season where his team is trying to go to the playoffs, which is one of the team’s goals. Imagine how much his mind will be racing with thoughts of having to make the free throws to win the game and get his team into the playoffs.

“If I make these we’re going to the playoffs! Uh-oh. What will everyone think if I miss? People will hate me. Oh God, I need to make these or I’m a loser.” And the list goes on and on. The noise, the chaos, the enormity of the moment will all be seeking to take his mind away from where it needs to be for him to achieve his and his team’s goals.

Ultimately, he has little control over the outcome if he doesn’t take care of the process that he has had for shooting free throws all year long (and maybe even for many years leading up to this point). He needs to clear his head of all the distractions and the “noise” and zero in on his process. Whatever he has created as a process for being at the free throw line, that is what he needs to focus on now. “Deep breath, dribble 1, dribble 2, dribble 3, spin the ball into my shot pocket, bend knees, deep breath, shot line, up & out, follow-through.”  Swish!

When he clears out all the noise and distraction and focuses on what he does every single time he goes to the free throw line, he has a much greater chance at success, which means he has a much greater chance at achieving his goals and his team’s goals.

The Importance of Committing to Habits

But that doesn’t just happen when he goes to the free throw line in that moment in the game. It starts with developing repetitive habits that he follows throughout the entire year. When he puts in time in the gym in the spring, summer, and fall, he develops the habits that become his process. He needs to focus his attention and effort on doing the somewhat mundane, daily tasks that become his process for when he goes to the free throw line (and every other skill he needs) in games.

By committing to creating a habit, he allows his habit to prepare him for eventual success. But he also focuses on the habit when he needs it; he doesn’t focus on the outcome. By focusing on the habit, he does not allow himself to get caught up in distractions of worrying about the outcome that can take him out of his focus on what needs to be done in the moment. The habit allows him to zero in on simple, repeated steps that will ultimately bring him to his success.

Focusing on process also allows him a simple way to re-focus when things aren’t going well, when he is in a bit of a shooting slump. He can quickly go through his process in his head to help him prepare and re-focus on what he needs to do to get back on track. I am not a parent who yells many things out to him while he is playing. It is his game, and he needs to play it. But when I see him slumping at the line a bit, I will sometimes yell, “Process” to him to help him re-focus himself on following his process and the positive habits for success that he has created for himself.

Consider all that I just discussed here for one simple skill – shooting a free throw. Now think about all of the skills, techniques, workouts, strategies, etc. that go into any practice or game situation. Do the same thing as was done for free throw shooting, and focus on the process rather than the outcome for each of those skills and techniques to maximize your chances for success.

Goals are extremely important for players and teams to have as something to shoot for. However, it is the process that one develops to create the habits for them to follow that will ultimately be able to lead them to their goals. Goals give us a destination; process and habits give us a way to get there. Focus on the way to get there if you want to get there. Focus your attention on the road you are on in this very moment in order to arrive at your final destination.

Next time I will wrap up this series by going against the grain a bit and discussing the idea of forgetting goals as the focus but focusing on our standards instead (which is actually part of focusing on our process).

These articles were written and contributed by Scott Rosberg

Aligning Individual & Team Goals (Post 3 of 5)

This is the newest post in my short series on the concept of “Individual vs. Team.” If you missed those first two posts, go to the posts – “Individual vs. Team” and “Individual Goals vs. Team Goals” – to be taken to them. Basically, each of those posts discussed the dilemma of our athletes having to balance their own individual needs and desires for what they hope to get out of playing sports and the needs of their teams. It is crucial that we coaches do all we can to instill a “Team-First Attitude” in our players and then consistently keep that message in front of them.

However, we must also recognize that kids will have their own individual goals, and we don’t want to quell those goals. Rather we need to teach them the importance of maintaining their own individual goals while at the same time putting the team goals ahead of their own. But how do we do that? This post will examine some ideas on that concept.

As was discussed in the last post, one way coaches can begin this process is by having coaches and kids both write down their individual goals and their team goals. Then set aside some time to discuss them. Be open and honest with your kids, so they will be open and honest with you.

Discussing Individual Goals

Once you have gotten the various goals out on the table (or more appropriately, up on a white board), discuss the various individual goals that they have. Talk a bit about why they want to accomplish what they want to accomplish. Then begin the process of discussing how those goals can fit into the team goals. What can each player do to fulfill their goals while at the same time focusing on the team’s goals? What strengths does each player bring to the team that will help the team achieve its goals while at the same time help the player achieve his/her goals?

For instance, in basketball, if a player has an individual goal of scoring 15 points per game, talk with her (or the team in general) about why she wants to do that. Ego is certainly a part of our goals, and we need to recognize that. But if this player is a really good scorer, help her (and the rest of the team) see that her scoring 15 points per game might be a good thing for the team. Scorers need to score, so it is okay for them to have goals related to that.

Discussing Potential Team & Individual Goal Conflicts

However, you should also discuss with her how scoring 15 points per game cannot be done at the expense of the team goals. She cannot focus on her own point total instead of the team’s total. She must work to score her points within the framework of what is best for the team throughout the game. It is up to coaches and teammates to help her recognize that her scoring points will help the team as long as she is not trying to score points for her own gain at the expense of the team’s success. In other words, if she is forcing tough shots up from very difficult spots on the floor, instead of finding open teammates with better shots, she is hurting the team. It is imperative for team success that she sees her role of being a scorer on the team as being, first and foremost, important to team success and then secondarily her own individual success. If she handles her goal in this way, it can be a really good thing for the team.

What if a player is not potentially a 15-point a game scorer and yet has scoring 15 points per game as a goal? Now we have a situation where the individual goals are in conflict with the team’s goals. If this player goes out on the court with a 15 ppg goal and tries to play with that as his focus, he will be thinking of himself and getting his points instead of thinking about what the team needs most. This will be detrimental to team success, and so the coach will need to discuss the situation with the player.

The coach will need to talk about ways to bring the player’s individual goals into alignment with the team’s goals, so that the individual goals are not being squashed, but at the same time they are not overcoming the team goals. The coach can help the player re-evaluate his goals and figure out what something more reasonable might be, while at the same time helping him see how this fits into the team goals.

Sacrifice & Reward

One other key to help players see the importance of sacrificing individual goals for team goals is for coaches to help players see that more often than not, when the team achieves what it seeks, the individual players will achieve what they seek. In this day and age of astronomical free agent salaries at the professional level, kids often see the individual rewards that players receive for their success. However, they sometimes forget that the players who receive the most are usually players that were on very successful teams. By being part of those highly successful teams, the players are often rewarded in big ways due to their contributions to the team’s success.

Youth and school coaches can use these situations to help show their players that the individual successes that the players achieved contributed to the team’s success. Then in return, the team’s success contributed to the players receiving the rewards that they sought. This is a great lesson for players to see that even at the highest levels of sport, individuals sacrifice for the team and that sacrifice often leads to even greater levels of success for both the individual and the team.

Next time, I will talk about the process and the habits necessary for players to commit to team goals!

These articles were written and contributed by Scott Rosberg

Individual Goals vs. Team Goals (Post 2 of 5)

In the first post in the series, I talked about the importance of team members focusing on team over individual.  If you missed that post,  Click “Individual vs. Team,” so you can read that one first. Today I want to take the idea a step further and zero in on the idea of individual vs. team when it comes to goals and goal-setting.

Goals are a key component of any endeavor, especially when it comes to organizations like teams. Most teams, whether they be sports teams, work teams, fund-raising teams, or any other team, will talk about the goals of the team as they begin to embark upon the journey of their season. Goals are a good way to create a destination for where the team wants to end up.

Individual and Team Goals Co-existing

The first question when thinking about the ideas of goals and goal-setting is, “Should team members develop individual goals or team goals? The answer is “Yes.” They should develop both kinds of goals. As I said in the last post, individual vs. team should not be an adversarial relationship. Individuals should be able to exist, function, and thrive within a team setting without giving up who they are as individuals. To quote that post, “People can be themselves as individuals with their own personalities, style, and goals, while at the same time sacrificing and putting the needs of the team ahead of their own.” I stated that for any team to have success, it was critical that individuals did this.

However, that does not mean that they cannot have their own individual goals. In fact, having their own individual goals is a good thing. Individual goals create a drive, dedication, and passion for working to be one’s best. While we want that same kind of dedication to team goals, people are human, and they will generally be more dedicated to things that will benefit them individually. Rather than fight that, we as coaches need to accept that and work within that understanding.

But how do we do that? How do we create a “team-first attitude” when we are accepting that people have “me-first goals”? We open up about it, and we have our players open up about it, too.

Write them Down

The first thing to do is have your players write down 3-5 individual goals that they have for their season or for their involvement on this team. Tell them to be as specific as they want to be. Use this list as a guide for better understanding where each of the members on your team is individually. This will help you figure out what’s most important to them, what they hope to get out of this experience individually.

As a coach, you need to do the same thing. Write down your individual goals for the season – YOURS for you, not for the team. (That comes next.) Coaches are human, too. They have their own individual goals for seasons, just like players do. Figure out what yours are, and write them down. Then be ready to discuss them with your players, just like you will be asking your players to do.

Next, have your players write down 3-5 team goals – things they hope the team will accomplish or the experience they hope the team creates for everyone. Again, coaches need to do the same thing. In fact, team goals are much easier for coaches to create than individual goals. This is the world in which we live. This is how coaches think all the time – “What do I want our team to accomplish this year? Who do I want us to become? What do I want our identity to be?”

Talk about Individual Goals

Now that players and coaches alike have their individual and team goals written down, set up time to talk about them. This can be done before or after practice, or it can be done at a separate meeting time. It is best if this is done as a team, so people hear what others would like to accomplish. This helps everyone on the team better understand why some players (and coaches) behave and perform the way they do. (However, given the nature of your team, you may choose to do this in individual meetings. Keep in mind, though, that this will take A LOT longer, and teammates will not know each other’s goals.)

Meeting in a group can also create a way for people to start to talk about holding each other accountable. By hearing one of my teammate’s goals, I may be able to help hold him or her accountable to achieving it. At the same time, if we hear individual goals that run counter to the team goals (more on that later), we can also work to hold teammates accountable to not pursuing those individual goals over the team goals.

In the discussion, coaches should start with their own individual goals, so players can hear that it is okay to have their own unique, individual goals. They will also see you as an individual with your own aspirations and goals – a human being just like them! Then have the players share theirs. Listen intently to what they say. You may want to videotape this meeting, or have someone writing down everyone’s goals, so you can refer to them in the future. Putting them on a whiteboard can be really beneficial, especially for the next part of the exercise.

Talk About Team Goals

Once everyone has laid out their individual goals, it is time to talk about everyone’s team goals. Depending upon how much time you took with the individual goals, you may need multiple days/meetings to do all of the individual and team goals. That is not necessarily a bad thing, as it may indicate that people are really into this and getting a lot out of it. However, don’t wait too long between meetings. You want the individual goals fresh in everyone’s mind when you start addressing team goals.

Again, use a whiteboard and write down everyone’s team goals. If multiple people have the same goal (like winning a conference or state championship), just write the numbers 2, 3, 4, etc. after the initial goal each time one is repeated.

Fitting the Goals Together

Once you have completed the team goals, now the work begins. Look at the list of individual goals and team goals. Discuss how some of the individual goals fit within the framework of others’ individual goals and with the team goals. You should also discuss how some of the individual goals may not fit with others’ individual goals or within the team framework. Finally, discuss any individual goals that are detrimental to others’ individual goals or the team goals. This is an important step in helping individuals come to grips with the impact their own goals have on their teams.

Ask them – “Where do your individual goals align with other’s individual goals? Where do they align with our team goals? Do any of your goals run counter to what others are trying to accomplish individually or what we are trying to accomplish as a team?”

Once you have had a good discussion and you feel you are ready to move forward, take the entire list of team goals that you have created and as a group come up with a narrowed down list of 3-5 team goals for the entire team. Listen to what people are saying as you narrow down your list. This list will become the team goals that you will focus on and refer back to throughout the season. It will also be the list of goals that you will hold players and coaches accountable to when their own individual goals are getting in the way of them working toward the team goals.

As I discussed in the last post, we are trying to create selflessness within our players and our teams, so that players become more “other-centered.” This is a learned thing, so we need to take the time to teach it, discuss it, and work on it. As I said in that post, “We must keep working to instill in them that the best chances for success on our teams are when we all understand the importance of focusing on what’s best for all instead of what’s best for the individual. Teams work best and succeed the most when everyone works together in pursuit of the success the team seeks over the success the individual seeks.” This individual and team goal-setting exercise is the first step in the process.

Next time, I will take this step further and work to align the individual and team goals for everyone.

About the Author of this Article

Scott Rosberg has been a coach (basketball, soccer, & football) at the high school level for 30 years, an English teacher for 18 years, and an athletic director for 12 years. He has published seven booklets on coaching and youth/school athletics, two books of inspirational messages and quotes for graduates, and a newsletter for athletic directors and coaches. He also speaks to schools, teams, and businesses on a variety of team-building, leadership, and coaching topics. Scott has a blog and a variety of other materials about coaching and athletic topics on his website – www.coachwithcharacter.com. He can be reached by email at [email protected].

Scott is also a member of the Proactive Coaching speaking team. Proactive Coaching is dedicated to helping organizations create character and education-based team cultures, while providing a blueprint for team leadership. They help develop confident, tough-minded, fearless competitors and train coaches and leaders for excellence and significance. Proactive Coaching can be found on the web at www.proactivecoaching.info. Also, you can join the 200,000+ people who have “Liked” Proactive Coaching’s Facebook page at www.facebook.com/proactivecoach. Scott can also be reached through Proactive Coaching at [email protected].

These articles were written and contributed by Scott Rosberg

Individual vs. Team (Post 1 of 5)

I hate the title of this post. “Why?” you may be asking. “You created it. Why would you create a title that you hate?”

I hate it because of one word – “vs.” (Is that even a word?!) The word “vs.” (or the actual word “versus”) automatically indicates an adversarial relationship between the two things on either side of it. It means there is a battle going on. The Chicago Blackhawks vs. the Minnesota Wild. The Dallas Cowboys vs. the New England Patriots. The United States vs. Russia. Republicans vs. Democrats.  Cowboys vs. Aliens. And the list goes on and on.

In every statement with a “vs.” in it, there is a competition where two entities are competing against one another. In sports, it is a key component. Teams and individuals compete against each other to try to win a contest, supposedly to see who is the best. (The competitions themselves, of course, do not always determine who is the best team/individual. On a daily basis around the world, you have upsets, where the better team/individual loses to the weaker one. It’s just that they were better or played better in that particular moment.)

In all of the instances above, “vs.” is a good thing. It creates the interest, the work ethic, the dedication to improve, the desire to perform, and the determination to overcome and succeed. I don’t have a problem with competition. If I did, I wouldn’t have stayed in coaching for the last 35 years.

“Can’t We Both Just Get Along?”

My problem is the “vs.” that is created in the concept of a person being an individual vs. being a great teammate who puts the team first. Why can’t someone be both? Why does that have to be an adversarial relationship? Why can’t they co-exist? Can’t the two just get along?!

Of course, they can. People can be themselves as individuals with their own personalities, style, and goals, while at the same time sacrificing and putting the needs of the team ahead of their own. Coaches ask players to do this all the time. This kind of sacrifice is at the heart of any team experience. It is critical for team success.

And yet, it is not always easy. I am no behavioral psychologist, but it seems to me that human nature is to be focused first on self and second on others. Yet, we see people all over the world who are “other-centered,” especially those in team settings. Selflessness and being focused on others seems to be more of a learned thing, although some people seem to be more prone to it naturally than other people do.

Selfless Competition

If selflessness is a learned behavior, though, then it is imperative that we as coaches, teachers, and leaders do all we can to stress the importance of it. We must continually focus on the importance of sacrifice for others, for team. Statements like “We over me,” “TEAM – Together Everyone Achieves More,” “Give up the Me for We,” and the myriad of other “team-first” statements are all made to help people remember that we are capable of so much more when we focus on being selfless and helping the entire group before we focus on helping ourselves.

However, in many places, this is a difficult message to instill. For instance, here in America, we are a society that loves competition. We compete against others to rise up and become our best. The image of the individual struggling against adversity and rising up after overcoming obstacles in life is revered as one of the greatest elements of the American spirit. And that is a good thing. It is good to have pride in one’s own work ethic, dedication to improvement, and the success they acquire.

However, it can also make it difficult to get people to completely buy in to the idea of having a “team-first attitude.” We tell players on our teams all the time that for us to have team success, they need to put the needs of the team ahead of their own in every decision they make. Imagine the level of success that a team could rise to if every player did that.

But that is not in every player’s mindset and makeup. From their own innate personalities, to the way they were raised by their parents, to the focus on individual development at their schools and within their friend groups, to the prevailing attitudes of the country in which they live, it is hard to get people to completely give themselves over to others and to team.

The Importance of “Communism” in Sport

I recently had a discussion with a friend of mine who is a fellow coach. We talked about the variety of “-isms” in our lives, and how they often taint a lot of really good concepts and ideas. One of those is “communism.” On the surface, communism would be a great thing, perfectly in line with what we as coaches want with our teams – everyone giving of themselves for the good of all. It is the ultimate in team-first attitude.

However, the concept of communism has been altered, adapted, and tainted through the years by so many leaders, people, and countries, that it carries very negative connotations for millions of people around the world, a terrible thing that we need to not only avoid but destroy, according to many. Because we have carried this feeling about communism for so long, it is hard for people to wrap their minds around the idea that some of the basic foundations of the word are actually good things for people to follow. (It is such an emotional topic that some of you reading this right now have probably lost a little respect for me or are feeling your blood pressure rise a bit because I even suggested this.)

Please don’t misunderstand me. I am not advocating that we become a communistic society. I am merely trying to illustrate that one of the reasons it so hard to get kids/people to completely buy into the concept of team-first is that some of our feelings are deeply ingrained in us as people because they have been ingrained in us in our families, in our social groups, and in our society.

So what do we do? Do we just throw up our hands and say, “Well, I guess we will never get all of our kids to buy in completely to team, so why bother?” Of course not. We must keep working to instill in them that the best chances for success on our teams are when we all understand the importance of focusing on what’s best for all instead of what’s best for the individual. Teams work best and succeed the most when everyone works together in pursuit of the success the team seeks over the success the individual seeks. When we do that, the sky is the limit for where we can go as a team, as a business, and as a country.

My next post will take this concept a step further and look at the importance of stressing Team Goals vs. Individual Goals and how to balance those as an individual.

About the Author of this Article

Scott Rosberg has been a coach (basketball, soccer, & football) at the high school level for 30 years, an English teacher for 18 years, and an athletic director for 12 years. He has published seven booklets on coaching and youth/school athletics, two books of inspirational messages and quotes for graduates, and a newsletter for athletic directors and coaches. He also speaks to schools, teams, and businesses on a variety of team-building, leadership, and coaching topics. Scott has a blog and a variety of other materials about coaching and athletic topics on his website – www.coachwithcharacter.com. He can be reached by email at [email protected].

Scott is also a member of the Proactive Coaching speaking team. Proactive Coaching is dedicated to helping organizations create character and education-based team cultures, while providing a blueprint for team leadership. They help develop confident, tough-minded, fearless competitors and train coaches and leaders for excellence and significance. Proactive Coaching can be found on the web at www.proactivecoaching.info. Also, you can join the 200,000+ people who have “Liked” Proactive Coaching’s Facebook page at www.facebook.com/proactivecoach. Scott can also be reached through Proactive Coaching at [email protected].

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Since team building is a huge part of the art of coaching, you can never have too many resources for team meetings, bulletin boards, or player’s notebooks.

Here is one that we hope you will find to be useful with your team:

1. Keep skid chains on your tongue. Always say less than you think. Cultivate a low, persuasive voice. How you say it often counts more than what you say.
2. Make promises sparingly and keep them faithfully, no matter what the cost.
3. Never let an opportunity pass to say a kind and encouraging word to or about somebody. Praise good work, regardless of who it is.
4. Be interested in others; their pursuits, their work, their homes and their families. Make merry with those who rejoice; with those who weep, mourn. Let everyone you meet, however humble, feel that you regard him as a person of importance.
5. Be cheerful. Don’t burden or depress those around you by dwelling on your aches and pains and small disappointments. Remember, everyone is carrying some kind of burden.
6. Keep an open mind. Discuss but don’t argue. It is a mark of a superior mind to be able to disagree without being disagreeable.
7. Let your virtues, if you have any, speak for themselves. Refuse to talk about the vices of others. Discourage gossip. It is a waste of valuable time and can be destructive and hurtful.
8. Take into consideration the feelings of others. Wit and humor at the expense of another are never worth the pain that may be inflicted.
9. Pay no attention to ill-natured remarks about you. Remember, the person who carried the message may not be the most accurate reporter in the world. Simply live so that nobody will believe him. Disordered nerves and bad digestion are a common cause of backbiting.
10. Don’t be anxious about the credit due you. Do your best and be patient. Forget about yourself and let others “remember.” Success is much sweeter that way.